icexxxtea:

faleep:

pinkifingers:

john-egberts-floating-arms:

rick-sanchez:

camiekahle:

THIS IS THE BEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN

I’VE BEEN TRYING TO FIND THIS FOR SEVEN YEARS

DO YOU UNDERSTAND HOW HARD IT IS TO ?????

I’m fucking dying

That last fatal scream tho

IT IS BACK ON MY DASH
THIS POST NEVER DIES
WHO EVER PUT THIS UP IS A GOD.

THE TERROR IN HIS SCREAM OH GOSH

drakethistoyourgrave:

please stop saying heterophobia doesn’t exist. i am a heterophobe, please don’t erase my agenda

It’s 12am and….

zodiaccity:

Aries is sleeping in an awkward position

Taurus fell asleep a long time ago, they’re the early birds

Gemini is wide awake doing something they don’t really need to be doing

Cancer is in the bed and can’t decide if they want the blanket on them or not

Leo is probably taking bedroom selfies

Virgo is trying to finish up something last minute while watching tv at the same time

Libra is tired as hell but can’t go to sleep

Scorpio is having a little late night pillow talk….on the phone

Sagittarius has about 2 hours of sleep in already

Capricorn is up knowing damn well they’re gonna be mad in the morning for staying up late

Aquarius is up browsing Netflix trying to find anything to watch

Pisces has massive amounts of drool on their pillow

lemonadesoda:

feralmermaids:

maralie:

i really love our generation’s joke trend of like, very calm but incredibly inflated hyperbole. like nobody says “oh she’s pretty” anymore we say “i would willingly let her murder me” and everyone is just like “lol same”

i think “same” is also great and “me,” i love when somebody reblogs a picture of like, a lizard, and just says “me” and we all know exactly what they mean. the current online Humor Discourse is remarkable because we trade exclusively in metaphors and implications and nobody ever, ever says anything outright and yet EVERYBODY understands each other perfectly

#ppl are gonna write their dissertations on this shit (x)

// @antlered-kitten

This reminds me of the time when I was on vacation with my family and we were hiking, and after using a rest stop, the conversation turned to the grossness of outhouses and port-a-potties, and I said that if I ever got splashback from a port-a-potty, “my soul would depart my body.” My parents found that hilarious, and my dad commented that my generation can be so clever with words bc he would only think to say something like “It would be disgusting” which doesn’t convey the sentiment nearly as well as “my soul would depart my body.”

just-shower-thoughts:

Amazon should have a “Secret Santa” feature, where you buy an item for a random person who has it on their wish list.

Anonymous asked
are u shadypiezzs gf

How did u find me?????

victoria-wayne:

p0kemina:

theequeenpin:

nefepants:

macsceneshawe:

1stfrom92:

When your lady on her period.

this got  funnier as it went

“Don’t call her a bitch but

GET YOUR BITCH SOME CHOCOLATE”

Facts 😂

There needs to be some sort of induction ceremony

This is the only comedy sketch that doesn’t make fun of women and their period. It try’s to make you relies how weird and annoying periods really are. That’s really refreshing